loose wiring and a turkey

sent this to a friend. it's worthy for print.

a confession. i have a strange urge to cook for people. family. not my family. but my pretend future family. chalk it up to that nonsense nesting urge infesting my brain. i just can't seem to logic it away. i've gone so far as to collect a few recipes or ads of food that look good as reminders should i have my house all fixed and ready for a dinner party, invitations printed, and am hosting the big day. in 20 yrs. or my next life.

sleepwalker

Oren Lavie - Her Morning Elegance
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learning from nature

creekside house

remember the little house next to bull creek on 2222 by the firehouse and county line? gone. torn down. wrecking crew still active today, so maybe last week. it was for sale recently and was looking really fixed up. guess the new owners decided they'd rather have a big box.

bad pool

threw out my mid back today. it's never been this bad. it took me 5 mins to figure out how to get out of bed. now i'm not sure what's next. was going to walk miss moots, but i'd need to take my cell phone and might have to call 911.

and all for what? a swim. geez. thought i could get away with going a little harder after being back on for some weeks.

that'll learn me. and these 60 hour weeks have got to stop so i can take better care during the week. funny thing is, i can usually still ride like this. will find out tomorrow.

moots

during

after

thristy knowledge

seriously. if you have not read them yet, your life has not reached anywhere near it's pinnacle. got to love sarcasm when it's dressed up like this on the interwebs. i admit, i may be one of a very small circle that finds this funny. but i stand by my convictions.

lady

for amy.

the scene with the eye patch in the hot tub breaks the moment, but it was either that or a montage of sharon tate (beautiful and sad, maybe more apropos).

and muddled lyrics translation for obsolete. french and engrish.

you ask questions, i give answers. at least for the simple questions.

exit

see also french leave. (thanks unk)

and she was

strong. beautiful. a survivor of unimaginable proportions. hilarious. an unrepentant shopper. lovely. a connoisseur. tall. a traveler. living life to the fullest. a loving mother. a proud grandmother. a motivator. witty. a successful entrepreneur. capable of anything. a truthful adviser. the boss. compassionate. unstoppable. determined. an adventurer. a twin. sarcastic. optimistic. a hero. unexpected. a mystery. an inspiration. a friend. a rose.

7:37 am

april 24, 2009
you are missed sweetheart. greatly missed.

modernism summed

interwebs tells me jg ballard died today. searched for this article which i read some years back. contained a favorite quote.

Modernism lacked mystery and emotion, was a little too frank about the limits of human nature and never prepared us for our eventual end.

fyi penguin, that house is listed here. nice pics.

fried

worked 26 hrs in 2 days. brain cooked. time for a mini vacation. sup' gave me 1 free vac day. ahh, enjoying it already. tomorrow headed for sun and water. hasta.

change of scenery

weekend wasn't a total wash. i did manage to get out in the yard and dig a bit, despite being sick. needed to do something other than lay in bed all day. managed to not get any good pics, but this will do for now.

in bloom:
hinkley's columbine.

$2.50 azalea from home depot that i hoped would be red. not quite. not even close.

same old

went for a walk with my girl inga to try to clear my head. still confused on yesterday's events. shouldn't be. it was, after all, par for the course.

kicked down and left behind with his dog and a pile of dirty junk to care for. same as it ever was.

then again

maybe it's not oak. fever went up over 100F. stayed up. coughing got worse. nose produced green stuff. that's not allergies. had a moment of panic sometime after midnight when i woke up gasping for air, but was coughing so hard i couldn't breathe. in my half asleep panicked state, i thought i was choking.

my helper who doesn't help was gone. he checked out. several times that night, and then permanently. kind of pissed about that. woke up to a resignation letter left at the top of the stairs.

thanks for the explanation.

oak

i'm pretty sure it was cedar. had me torn up from late dec through late feb. out of control sneezy. i would wake up to sneeze. box of tissue per week at work. can't work on the computer without constant drip drip sneeze drip drip. intermittent fever, always just under 100F. early on, the rhinitis was so bad i literally could not move air through my nose. if you had taped my mouth, i would have suffocated. ridiculous. it took a nasal corticosteroid to breathe again. granted, i only used it 3 times, but c'mon. i never take drugs. rather adamant about it.


and now oak? is it possible? i've lived in this town for 16 years. never had bad allergies. no more than a stray day here and there. i do not understand. i now know what allegra d is for.

this time it's more chest. wet cough. a cinder block on my chest. talk too long, cough. laugh, cough. i'm trying my best not to cough right now. can't sleep more than 3 hours at a time. wake up hot, feeling like something is just off. almost imperceptible, like high blood pressure or something. i can't tell if it's the allergy fever or the drugs or what.

the drugs almost work during the day. they cut the sneezy drip in half. i can function with brain mostly serviceable. it's tolerable. but nights are a mess.

soon they'll find out the stuff causes heart/liver/renal failure. or maybe that it sensitizes your histamine response so that you can never go back to your pre-allegra allergy free days. ever again.


or maybe that instead of just being allergic to cedar, you're now allergic to oak. and mold. ragweed. and so on. i'm already looking at my 1/2 empty orange bottle thinking, oh god, what have i done?

dry

after the age of 30 the skin completely forgets how to moisturize itself. i have spent the last several years looking for the perfect lotion. not too watery. not too smelly. sometimes i am my grandmother.

yes, mr. ex-neighbor. i had a bday. lucky 7. you were close. from left to right, the cats are grey (tinker), skinny (scout/scooter) and tombear (tom-tom; no relation to you).

music missing from the beach list: tom petty, grateful dead.

music that reminds me of the beach

items listed do not indicate my like or dislike. this general soundtrack plays in every restaurant and shop there. the lone exception to the pallete would be paper planes by m.i.a. which was playing in a swim suit shop. i've had a fondness for it ever since and it recently reappeared for me in slumdog.

dire straits
neil young
bob dylan
eagles
country (can't conjure up a band or genre. it's all the same.)
jimmy buffet
bob marley
zz top

as if i hadn't heard enough classic rock in high school behind the pine curtain. i had associated a feeling of nausea with zz top and jimmy buffet. now i smile and think of sticky wind and sandy sunburn.

the condition at work led me to input one or two of these groups into pandora next to the pixies, mr airplane man, radiohead, theivery corp. every time a beach song comes up, i have a mini escape. i can almost smell the stale fishy air.